What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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