her vagine was all disorganized.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
