Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
