Sry I called you an 8
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
