He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
