My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
