So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
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