Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(810): View more from Michigan

This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle

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(714): View more from California

Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?

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(260): View more from Indiana

I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.

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(318): View more from Louisiana

That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.

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(631): View more from New York

I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys

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(813): View more from Florida

I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.

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(951): View more from California

you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil

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