Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
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