He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize