I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
