She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
