Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
