if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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