so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Randomize