She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
