Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize