do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
