Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
As shirtless as possible
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
