I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
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