we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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