Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Randomize
