That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
