So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize