are you so shy because you have an std?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
