he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize