Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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