then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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