the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize