dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Randomize
