This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Randomize
