You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
