in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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