I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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