the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
