it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize