So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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