David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Randomize