And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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