I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I made him laugh his dick is mine
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
