great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
