Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
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