Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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