I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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