She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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