Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
So here I am, sexting at work.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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