I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Come on in and take your pants off
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