the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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