porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
