He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
