who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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