Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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