Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
