Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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